We all know that many different substances are addictive. Drugs, alcohol, cigarettes and even coffee are a few examples. Have you ever felt that you are addicted to some kind of social network like facebook, msn, myspace or twitter? Like substance addictions, social network addictions can also be "life altering" and extraordinarily hard to give up. For one week, try to see if you can completely get rid of all of your social media and technology. Stop using facebook, twitter, myspace and even stop texting. Do you think you could? I myself am definitely addicted to social media and social networks. When I get up in the morning, before doing anything else, I check my text messages. Following this, I check my msn messenger (which I leave on all night, because I waking up to messages). As I am clicking through different windows, I am also signing on to facebook to see if I have any messages there. After several minutes, I begin to browse or "creep" through my friends' facebook pages. I have a psychological "need" to be updated constantly with other peoples' information. Is it really that big of a deal knowing every little move that people make? This process happens numerous times a day. I rush home from work to check my computer (again, it is left on all day long).
This brings me to another little "secret" about my addiction. I have facebook on my cell phone. If people write on my wall, send me a message or comment on a post I wrote, I will get a text message. I usually reply to all of them, while at work. Not only do I have facebook on my phone, but I also get text messages constantly throughout the day. Do I really need to check my phone that often? No. Lets be real. Would it be easy for me to give up my phone and computer? No. In fact, I can more easily give up coffee and television. I thought that giving up pork and beef would be a challenge. You know what? It was not as hard as I had thought. I tried to give up the use of my computer and cell phone for social means. How long did I last? Less than a day. Pretty sad, but true.
I recently met a girl a little bit older than me (she was 27, I am almost 25). I told her to add me to facebook. She said "oh I do not have facebook". My mouth dropped. I stared at her thinking perhaps she was just kidding. She was not. I had always thought that everyone had facebook. It was strange to hear that someone in their 20s did not have facebook. I talked to her about this. Asked why she did not have facebook. She told me she simply did not want to conform and become addicted to facebook like a lot of people she knew. I told her "I think it is best actually if you do not get facebook. It becomes so addictive." It may not become addictive to everyone, but from what I have seen, a lot of people are addicted to facebook. When something fun, exciting or funny happens, I get my phone out and I change my facebook status so that all my friends on facebook knows. Do these people really want to know that I watched Beetlejuice? No. But the fact that people reply "omg I love that movie" click "like" on my status, makes me happy.These replies help feed my addiction. When I get lots of replies, messages or comments on facebook I get a rush that can be very similar to a euphoric feeling of certain drugs. It makes me want more. So, what do I do? I start updating my status more.
Is this "addiction" a problem? We see things as a problem when it starts to interfere with daily routines or lifestyles. Have I been late for work because I was on facebook? Yes. Do I text at work when (knowing full well it will lower my productivity)? Yes. Do I stay up late at night and lose sleep because of it? Yes. Luckily I am not married and have no partner (or kids), but in this situation is can also be viewed as "a problem". Spouses may be "together" in physical terms but, "psychologically" or "mentally" not "together" when they are using these forms of social networks. Even if the couple tried to carry on conversations while one (or both) partners are on facebook, the communication quality is not going to be a great as it would be if they just turn the computer off. We are beginning to enter an era where texting at the table is "normal" because people are seeing constant cell phone usage as "normal". I would not say I am "against" teenagers having cell phones. If I had a teenager, the only time they would get a cell phone is if they went out with friends and I was not going to be with them. They could call me if there was an emergency. They would not be going to high school with their cell phones. The only time they could have their cell phone on them is when they went out to hangout with friends. It would make me feel much more calm. "Dad, I am 18 I can do what I want". Okay, you're 18, do what you want. With your own money :).I know I am not even CLOSE to fatherhood, but I began to form my expectations and "rules" many years ago.
Am I going to get rid of my facebook and cell phone? No. It would be too difficult for me. I am going to try my best to limit my use of both and see how it goes.
